Yes, you are reading the heading correctly.  There are many times throughout my days or weeks that I encounter some attractive looking man and more often than not they are pleasant, polite and all to eager to flirt back.  But on this particular day, I was not prepared for what happened.  I was at a nearby convenience store getting gas and about to run errands.  Had my cup of java with me, blasting some tunes and looked forward to getting back home to enjoy a day by the pool.  I was waiting to pull out of the parking lot when a good looking young man, in a jeep, began to pull in the parking lot.  He had to pass me to do so.  As he was turning in, our eyes locked and my thoughts became mushy and I got this stupid grin on my face.  I really thought we were having a moment.  What a way to start my already fabulous morning.  Me, mid-40’s, not bad on the eyes and this young 20 something locking eyes.  Great ego booster…but what he did next brought me back to reality…he began to feverishly waves his hand and then a certain finger, he was yelling cause he didn’t think he had enough room to pull in, eyes burning a hole in me.  My mouth dropped open and I began to look at him with fright.  I couldn’t believe how riled up he was and we hadn’t even spoken.  Well, I have been around long enough that I, under no uncertain terms, was going to put up with that crap.  Especially when I thought we had a moment.  How dare he shun me after I gave him the time of day…well in my thoughts, but he didn’t know that!  When he pulled in, (the jackass had plenty of room)  I decided to hit reverse and confront my wasted daydream head on.  I rolled down my window and he did the same.  I said to him “Is that how you are going to start my day dick head?  Yes, my day?  Maybe you would like to start your day off by being a prick but not to this girl.”  I nodded my head and drove off.  I must say, I left him dumbfounded.  He didn’t respond verbally but his facial expression showed surprise.  Sometimes you just have to call others out on there crap.  I hope I gave him something to think about.  I, on the other hand, had a fantastic day.   If by chance I run into him around town, I will be sure I mention our interaction.  I look out for that jeep everyday. 

Oh my god, do you think anyone gives a crap out your conversations in public places?  How important do you think you are?  Your phone conversations should be private.  You are so rude to answer a phone during an outing at a restaurant…take your ass outside…I don’t want to spend my dinner listening to your one-sided conversation.  You users are rude and inconsiderate to those around you.  I had refused taking care of a customer because he wouldn’t get off the phone.  It was important that he do so because we were talking about medications for his pet.  I don’t want to forget to mention that you talk so loud as if you have a 90 year old on the other end who isn’t wearing hearing aids!  I have had no problem to tell someone to get off the phone or take it outside.  Yes, that may be pretty forward but I feel confident that I am acting on many of my peers behalf.

My observation regarding those who chat on cell phones while driving…idiots!  I cannot stand when I am behind someone who is on the phone…its always the same, ie; driving slow, not sure what lane to go in, sits at the green light, cannot handle a lane change without a near miss collision, driving in the school zone (you know who you are)  and totally oblivious as to what is going on around them.  This applies to you professionals out there as well.  I am not going to single out any particular group… it really gets under my crawl….not because it is all about me…how about the simple fact that you are an accident waiting to happen.  Especially those of you who text while driving…I know you know who you are…

What is self worth?  I know I am not alone in this.  It is so easy to put yourself on the back burner…maybe you have children you tend to, or your pets, household chores, car pool.  You get the point.  I know what some people think…that I am a scatter brain, I don’t follow through on what I say I will do (when it comes to myself) and life just happens to consume everything I have.  We get too content, in a rut, we may not feel the same about ourselves.  We gain some weight, our looks are changing, age is setting in psychologically and physically.  You just want to know that you are worth something to someone. 

I recently came across the Peta article requesting Ben and Jerry’s to stop using milk in their icecream and replace it with breast milk.  Holy crap does anyone see the stupidity in this.  Are there actually freaks of nature out there who would sell their breast milk for profit???  Are there actually lactating women out there who would consider doing this?  Last I knew, breast-feeding is a natural and beautiful experience with your newborn!  Also for human enjoyment with your spouse!  Yes, some people are milk intolerant but there are other choices out there for those who are afflicted with diabetes, milk intolerance, etc.  I personally don’t want to sit down and enjoy icecream to be told that I just consumed a women’s breast milk that was being maintained long after the child flew the coop!  Yuk!  I know I am not the only one out there who finds this a bit perversed!  Are the  nuts at Peta really aiming for this?  I mean come on…why don’t we take it a step further and demand the dairy farmers to stop supplying milk.  Why don’t we start a breast milk farm, line these crazies up and attach a breast pump on them 24/7.  That doesn’t sound to far fetched.  I am sure women will line up to be man-handled for the sake of giving the cows a break.  It would take a large population of lactating women to maintain the supply and demand of cows milk.  Hey, its for the sake of the cows, right?  Listen, I am an animal lover like many many others, but this is borderline insanity.  I love my dogs to death, support local animal shelters, etc.  But you can’t replace a cow utter for a human ta-ta.  That is not the way nature intended it to be.  I want to enjoy my favorite Ben & Jerry’s with cows milk. 

People who drive in the left lane, the passing lane.  For those of you out there who understand what I mean by the left lane.  Example; you are on the highway, you pull out of the right lane to get into the left lane and proceed to pass the car on the right.  You pull into the right lane when it is safe to do so.  You get the picture.  Many people do not understand this simple and common practice across the country.  In some areas it is the flippin’ law yet there are those oblivious knuckleheads who just cruise along and disrupt the flow of traffic.  Boy does that get under my skin!  So many times I want to put my thumb and finger in the shape of an ‘L’ when I have to pass them on the right!!!  Damn dingdongs, get the hell out of the way!  Or how about those that just stay in the left lane their entire trip, doing the speed limit, riding side by side with the right lane driver and not aware that they have a line of vehicles behind them.  Or clueless as to why the person behind them are flashing their highbeams to move out of the damn way.  As much as I would love to just sail along, you have to be a considerate driver.  I know that considerate drivers are few and far between, but come on, after years of driving isn’t it common knowledge to move over?  They are as bad as rubberneckers.  That subject is for another day!

Ciao!

Someone asked me recently how often my husband and I are intimate.  I had to think about that for a moment.  Did she mean actual sex…do hand shakes count?  Kiss on the cheek?  Pat on the behind?  Of course I knew what she was asking but it is pretty sad that we get so caught up in the day to day that you might have to actually schedule a time for love-making.  Between work, school, kids and their social life, your passion gets put on the back burner waiting to be ignited.  It is so easy to put your needs last while you tend to everything else.  I am sure by the end of the day/week you are so drained emotionally that the thought of even shaving your legs for the ‘event’ is exhausting.  Some of you may be a morning person whiles others would enjoy a middle of night romp.  I like the early evening or middle of the night roll over myself.  I have had time to sleep some of my day away, I am half asleep and I am not expected to do much.  Pretty pathetic, huh?  My husband is gung ho in the morning, (which by the way is natural seeing that their testosterone levels are built up from the night and frankly why would that turn me on) I feel that he will figure it out with or without my assistance.  You see where I am going with this.  We take for granted that our other half is content with the way things have become.  Maybe it is an unwritten rule of long time unions.  I don’t know.  I do know that we all have passion within us just waiting to be unleashed.  We need some incentive, some sort of motivation, some intimacy to get the juices flowing.  I always tell my husband that I get turned on when he doesn’t speak!  I know, pretty harsh.  But sometimes he just puts his size tens in his mouth!  Or he is there physically but you know by the body language he would rather be watching sports and making unnecessary noises in his ‘man’ room.  I am just as guilty as he.  I much prefer to watch a rerun of one my favorite shows then take the time and energy to perform.  I always plan on turning over a new leaf etc. but then something happens.  Life gets in the way.

Ciao!

Ladies, have you ever composed different scenes in your head.  You know, ones of rescue and romance.    Hmmmm…it is okay to fantasize…in fact it is quite healthy for a marriage.  If I didn’t dream up crazy scenarios, my husband and I would be a sexless married couple!!  There is nothing wrong in re-enacting the scene in your mind of Richard Gere (from the movie An Officer and a Gentleman) busting down the front door and rescues you from the piles of laundry you have been doing for 15 straight years!  Ooooh, how about when Kevin Costner from Robin Hood is determined to get his Maid Marion….Oh and for you Sex and the City fans…what about when Big went to Paris to profess his love to Carrie during the last season?   I have to say that my husband is not a very romantic person.  He just isn’t built that way.  To no fault of his own, he just wasn’t exposed to that as a young boy growing up.  His father was a watered down version of Archie Bunker with an english accent.  Anyways, fantasies and such are harmless ways of staying in touch with that side of you.  It gives you a boost of friskiness.  I can’t speak for you out there, but I need all the help I can get!  As a matter of fact, I am about to watch a movie right now!

Ciao!

That’s how it was when I met and decided I was going to marry my now husband.   I just knew I was going to marry him.  There was an instant jolt that went through me.  I was reeled in by his boyish smirk and of course the take charge way he handled me.  Now mind you it wasn’t just me….I  came with a ready made family.  That would be the true test of grit!  He passed with flying colors.  I dated a variety of characters before I found him.   I dated a stripper, (unbeknown to me) a racist, (he wanted to make sure my children were of a certain race) a don juan who felt me up under the table during our first and only date at dinner and a man, who come to find out, still lived with his mother.  Oh and the one who took me to Denny’s on our first and last date.  My husband and I have endured many ups and downs throughout the years but we love and respect one another.  We are best friends in every sense of the word and we fight like ones too!  There is a security knowing that someone is there for you no matter what occurs.  I don’t know what I would do without him.  We have a great family and a fantastic life.  If it weren’t for those dating mishaps I wouldn’t have seen what fate put in front of me.  There are times I could throw in the towel or better yet a frying pan at his head but I won’t.  We have a beautiful thing going on here and I can only hope others can see that in there own marriage as well.

Ciao!

Scooter strikes again.  He set his sights on the boy who wasn’t aware of his talents.  You see, we had a July 4th cookout and amongst the guest were children.  This makes for a happy beagle because he starts scoping out the prospects.  He watches and waits.  He narrows down his unassuming victims by the way they carelessly watch their food.  How they are sharing stories, laughing, playing and of course not focusing on their food!  He doesn’t approach right away…he stays far enough away where he isn’t noticed while everyone positions themselves around tables and the pool.  Then he sees his chance….the poor fool who has to leave his plate to get a drink!  He slowly approaches and before I make the connection between the empty chair and a missing body, it is too late.  He has struck.  My husband runs towards the beagle but the crying has started, kids are covering there plates and of course I am just laughing in the background.  I knew full well this would occur.  The beagle has a way of blending in to where you let your guard down.  He outsmarts us more than I would like to admit.   I know what you are thinking, why wasn’t he crated for a time.  Well, like I said, he is good at blending in.  He lays low, keeps his snout out of trouble and waits.  You get comfortable that it is going so smoothly.  Heck, I even moved inside chairs to a guest room so he couldn’t do a grab and run of the food that was displayed on the dining table.  But it doesn’t matter how clever I am.  He gets me every now and again.   Beagles are notorious garbage dogs.  He could eat himself to death.  He never knows when he has had enough.  I feed him what is recommended and a high premium food.  Why isn’t this dog satisfied??   When he does get his grubby paws on table food, he is sick to his stomach and gets runny stools.   But it doesn’t stop him the next time.  We often wonder why he would continue to do it if he gets sick…doesn’t he remember how it makes him feel, etc…  I think he just likes the challenge.  The next cookout he will size up his next victim.  He will make some unsuspecting kid cry and I will probably be in awe at how good his is.   Even though I think he is a block head, we love him dearly.  He is always giving us a story.  I am sure to have one soon.

Ciao.